We have had very rainy weather the past two weeks and it is pouring with rain right now. And, along with the rain, the last ten days or so have been another kind of ordeal. Right after training my dogs, my heart stopped beating for ten seconds. I had an implanted monitor, so this was caught on the monitor, and my heart started up again on its own (or I wouldn't be typing this), and I was admitted to the hospital for an emergency pacemaker insertion. I had been having blackouts, and for the past many months I couldn't drive anywhere. I could work, and the nursery work went along well, actually, since I was at home all the time, no dog shows, no hiking, no seed collecting trips. During this time one of my terriers, Willie, was diagnosed with Cushing's disease from a pituitary tumor, and within two days of me leaving the hospital, he took a turn for the worse and I had to take him in to be euthanized.
I have, or had, three dogs, but Willie was my favorite in some ways. He was no good at agility since he had severe arthritis, and all his life he had one health problem after another. So maybe I felt more protective towards him, but he also had the most personality of all of them. He was funny and the most loving and affectionate dog I have ever had. Hannah is my dancing partner, my agility dog who has won multiple championships, my little shadow that responds to my every movement and cue. Arlo is the baby, meek and submissive and adorable, but Willie was just Willie, and that is all he needed to be.
My broken heart will heal. My cardiologists are the best, and I am told that in five weeks my activity will be unrestricted and I can run a marathon if I want. I don't want, I just want to work and go hiking and running with my dogs. The big hole in my heart with the loss of Willie will someday be filled by another puppy, but I will miss him forever.